I applied for this job when I was at my worst. I had no idea what I wanted to do at that stage and the job appealed to me almost as a PLAN B option in life. But still I did want to see my future in which I would have to regret about something that I wish I could have done so I would go with any it as it would be the best way to know how much I would love/hate it…
The fun fact is that the job turned out so much different than I thought it would be. I still remember exactly how negative I was while thinking of all this… The fact is apart from a job which keeps me busy on a daily basis, it turned out to be ridiculously exciting and guess what? I am actually having fun right now – this is something I really did not expect from the very first days. I am actually getting along with so many people I thought I would not…
So I think I’ve changed – not to become a completely different person but a better version of mine. I guess it’s just time that we will just need to get rid of all our concepts if you want to live or work happily regardless of how or what you want to do with your life. I have not seen this normality for so long… I’ve been waiting and waiting and waiting to get my authentic self back and I think I am getting there…
It’s 11:38 PM now I know I have to go to bed. But it doesn’t stop me anyway from typing a quick post since I have not posted anything on my blog for ages. It’s really been a roller coaster which doesn’t always go up. But I am feeling good right now and I don’t think I should expect for more. I think I’ve done a great job so far. No matter it was a great act or it simply because of who I really was. More than several times I confessed some of my weak moments to some friends of mine. Whenever I say I feel lack of confidence, and I always get the same answer: “If you are not confident of yourself then I don’t think I can find anybody who is”. Well I guess this is a compliment or whatever it is – it’s lifted me up a little bit.
So I’ve been at my third job now after 3 years almost. It’s kind of hard to believe but there’s a tendency that people actually hire me for my personality. Well I don’t know yet how great I am – I am new to many new things – but I guess I will be fine. This is not the first time I have heard of this: All I need to do is to be confident. Sometimes I tend to forget the fact that I am still very young and I will have a lot to to learn and experience… Fingers crossed! Tomorrow’s a brand new Monday! 11:53 PM
Few days ago:
Boy: Hey, I’ve got you a present.
Girl: Thanks, what’s that?
Boy: I will not tell you until I see you again and I will give it to you.
Girl: Okay 🙂
Boy: Hey, are you there?
Boy: Do you remember I said I had a present for you?
Boy: It doesn’t exist anymore.
Girl: Really? Was it food? Did it get expired?
Boy: No 😦 Actually it was a stone. I found it on the street while the kids were playing. Then I took it home and worked on it to make you a present. But today I dropped it and it was broken.
Girl: Don’t worry. It was so nice of you already. Thank you so much.
Boy: But I just wanted to see you smile when you see it.
Girl: I’ve already smiled.